Girls Complimenting Girls

11 November 2016


There's a boutique that I go into every now and then where the girls who work there say hi and say that they love your outfit today! Now I have been known to put together a cute outfit every now and then, but on these particular days I was dressed reasonably average. Not to mention that the comment has happened more than once. Meaning that this is just a thing that the shop girls say to customers.

We've all seen Mean Girls when Regina compliments that girl's skirt and then mocks her behind her back. It's our worst nightmare to receive a compliment that's disingenuine, whether it's to try and flatter you in a store or to poke fun at you once you turn away.

I also work in a boutique where I often compliment customers on various things. I can honestly say that I have never complimented anyone on something and not meant it. It is often for selfish means though, I love your shoes where are they from! I'm not just trying to make conversation, i'm going to go jot down the name of that store. I'm always on the lookout for new fashion pieces and spotting them on girls down the street is often where I find the best stuff. Having the excuse of being a shop assistant is the best reason to start a conversation so I can hopefully discover where you scored that cool bag.

I know this is about ladies complimenting other ladies, but my boyfriend and I have an understanding that he will only compliment me if he genuinely means it. Girls he says nice things about me and to me and I get lots of compliments all the time and they mean so much more because I know that it's what he honestly thinks. He's good with outfits and I can ask him if these shoes look weird with this or what jacket do you think would work the best. 

Having a boyfriend like this comes in handy that's for sure! He never disses me or puts me down though so keep that in mind, because that's not okay, or what this post is about. Fake compliments are not okay... even if you just want to make the other person feel better. Do it in a different way. 

If you got a million compliments everytime you knew you looked pretty crap would you start to think maybe you don't look crap? Or would you think the compliments are bullshit. Come on it's okay to look like shit sometimes and know that you do. I don't need someone trying to butter me up while i'm in my track pants and Harry Potter sweater, all covered in cat hair. 

What I'm mostly trying to say is, get out there! Say nice things to other babes about their hair and makeup and what they're wearing. But only do it if you mean it! No one cares if you keep your mouth shut. You're not offending anyone by not complimenting their outfit. It's easier to tell if someone doesn't really believe what they're saying. 

If you've ever complimented me and I've awkwardly blurted out a compliment back, it's not a sudden grasp at finding something to say, I've probably been thinking it for the past 20 minutes and was caught off guard with a good opening to tell you! 

Have you ever had a compliment from someone and been suspicious? Or have you ever complimented someone at work or out and not meant it? Tell me in the comments ! xx




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16 comments

  1. This is a different point of view on an issue and I like it! I guess I'd never quite thought about this before, but it's so true. I find I don't hand out compliments much to randoms, but that comes down to a shy personality more than anything - in terms of receiving I tend to find when I'm wearing my statement outfit pieces people tend to notice and say something - as someone who thinks they don't experience this issue I can't really say personally I feel it, but I can completely understand it and I think it's important to many not make handing out compliments and constant and automatic thing because then they can lose the special feeling attached to them which brightens someones day.

    Great post xx.

    Amy
    www.thenoiseinwonderland.com

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  2. I'm always finding ways to awkwardly deflect compliments, I'm trying to own it more. But yeah, girls complimenting girls is powerful! Especially because we've been taught that other girls are competition/pit against each other in a way that boys aren't.

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  3. Interesting post, I love it, thank you for sharing!!!

    xxx

    www.bridesonamission.com

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  4. Loving this post! Girls have the power to build up each other and we should! When I get a compliment from a girl, it means more to me than from a guy haha! Lovely post xo

    Anika | anikamay.co.uk

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  5. I've worked in retail for several years and always enjoyed complimenting women (and men!) on their outfits. When I walk into a store and receive a compliment I'm instantly flattered, but then think if they are working for commission, did they really mean it? A barista boy at Starbucks complimented my sweater the other day and I was like thanks! and felt good, but then thought, was he being genuine?

    http://www.insearchofsheila.com

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  6. I love giving people compliments, when I notice something extra special about them! I feel like people should be recognized when they put in that extra effort!

    In the theme of compliments, you look amazing, and If only I could wear that outfit over in the UK now!

    Georgia | The Weekend Attic

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  7. Having worked as a wedding photographer I am certainly familiar with this topic!

    I've always said to junior photographers "Don't fake compliments to brides; they can smell it on you.". But of course every bride likes to hear and feel like she's the most beautiful woman in the world on their wedding day. Usually this is very easy because people bring game to weddings and there will always be something beautiful to remark upon.

    But sometimes there is some creative truth telling. It helps to remember that even if something isn't your style, it's their style. If a bride turns up in lime green froo-froo, then there's a good chance that it's to suit their eccentric and unique personality. Sometimes commenting that an outfit is very unique, outside the box or very suited to their personality is the most valuable compliment you can give. "I've never seen such a vibrant dress! Do you love it? Yes? That's so awesome! I'm so glad that you managed to find something that is so You". They're embracing who they are and *that* is beautiful.

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    Replies
    1. I love this Kelly! You're so right. You can compliment someone on something you may not necessarily love but you know they love so it makes it genuine! Which I think is really cool. Such a good point xx

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  8. I don't really see the point of faking compliments. I mean, I suppose in a retail setting it could be a strategy get someone to buy something when they try it on and you tell them it looks good, but apart from that it doesn't get you anywhere or anything doing it, so what's the point? I'd much rather compliment someone on a part of their outfit or style or whatever else that I actually like, and I'd like to think most people's compliments are genuine, but it's definitely not nice to feel like they're not like you did with that girl.

    littlehenrylee.net

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  9. This is such a cute photo! And I agree with what you said, it is so true! x

    www.bisoushollyolivia.co.uk

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  11. I love this. I work in retail as well and aside from compliments I just like having genuine conversations with customers. A work mate said once "how do you act all happy talking to customers" and I wasn't acting I made the conscious effort to be interested and have a positive interaction. Which I think ties in well with complimenting people.

    As you said if you don't 100% like what they are wearing etc you can be kind in other ways, compliment their personality or something. If we all start having more positive interactions it'll make the world (or just our small worlds) a bit easier

    Great post and ideas! x
    Rai | utterardour.blogspot.com

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  12. Great post! I always do that,I'll be on the train see a handbag or scarf I like and compliment ask the where its from. I've had two reactions from girls, either they were happy and appreciative that I noticed or either I get a huff and they turn their head like 'why was I looking at her'. That hasn't stopped me from asking or complimenting something I like!

    www.beautyreign.blogspot.com.au

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  13. I love this. I get so frustrated when I ask a loved one "How does this look?" Knowing full well I look like a Giant potatoes in a teeny tiny sake. I mean it does beg the question why ask, but a second opinion can't hurt... But to make things worse they reply with "you look great!".... What?! Are you seeing what I am?! Jesus wept.... X

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  14. Lovely blog post :) I think it's important now than ever to compliment girls more than ever :) A compliment goes a long way that others realise :) I try to return a compliment when someone gives me one.

    Jordyn x

    junerobin.blogspot.com

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  15. This is so true! Compliments can be a powerful thing, especially when they are genuine
    x

    A Pair of Ones | Bloglovin

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Thanks so much for commenting everyone! I read and appreciate every single one of your comments! xx